Trans Resilience is…
I love the word “resilience.” Webster’s has two definitions. The first is “an ability to recover from or adjust easily to misfortune or change.” The second one is more interesting: “the capability of a strained body to recover its size and shape after deformation caused especially by compressive stress.” At first look, it seems likeContinue reading “What is “trans resilience”?”
After I decided to transition, but before I started Testosterone, I noticed changes in my libido. And then, about a month after I started Testosterone, my libido reached heights I never would have imagined. I was aroused, basically all of the time. It was actually annoying, as well as quite exciting. Of course, Testosterone asContinue reading “Changes in Libido”
If you haven’t ever heard of Lou Sullivan, you should read a little about him. He is considered probably to be the first out gay trans man. For a long time, he was denied gender reassignment surgery because of his sexuality. Back then, gender and sexuality were conflated. If you were assigned one gender atContinue reading “Complexities of Gender Identity”
Because of our society’s bias toward the gender binary, and the policing of gender norms, a lot of trans people, as well as non-binary, gender-expansive, gender-queer, people feel the need to limit their gender expression. It’s important to point out that gender identity and gender expression are two separate things. You can choose to presentContinue reading “Gender Expression and Presentation”
I haven’t yet had a chance to write a standard “dating while trans” post here, and given that there is a pandemic on, and that changes dating immensely, I figured I would talk a little about both. Some people have simply chosen to hold off on dating completely now, and I think that’s a rationalContinue reading “Dating While Trans in a Pandemic”
This post is primarily for people who have chosen to do HRT (Hormone Replacement Therapy.) Your emotions might fluctuate during transition if you aren’t on HRT, just because of your choice to come to an authentic expression of yourself. But hormones are really powerful, and can have large effects on our emotional lives. Emotional changesContinue reading “Emotional Changes During Transition”
What does it mean to communicate “consciously”? And why is that even helpful? Conscious communication means several things: Being aware of your emotions in the moment Taking responsibility for your own emotions Speaking without defensiveness, blame or criticism Active and compassionate listening The point of communication is, of course to hear and be heard. ButContinue reading “Conscious Communication”
One of the great things about being trans or gender-expansive, is that we’re already breaking lots of cultural norms. How about introducing another norm to break: relationships! Relationship Anarchy: Know What You Want The concept of “Relationship Anarchy” is a relatively new one. The term was coined by a Swede, Andie Nordgren. The basic ideaContinue reading “How to Create a Relationship Life That Works for You”
In the two posts before this, I outlined the first six aspects of Trans Resilience. Here are the final three. Another note: these are in no particular order – the first three are not necessarily more important than these last three. Explore the sensations of your body. Full embodiment is a challenge and journey forContinue reading “The Final Three Aspects of Trans Resilience”
In my last post, I outlined three aspects of trans resilience. Here’s three more. A note: there is some overlap in these aspects, ways in which working on one (such as standing in your self-worth) will help with another (such as respecting your own and other’s gender journeys.) These are all really just guideposts toContinue reading “Three More Aspects of Trans Resilience”
The word “Resilience” has 10 letters, so I felt compelled to use 9 of them to outline 9 aspects of Trans Resilience. This is a series of 3 blog posts, detailing these aspects, three at a time. In future blog entries (as well as in workshops, classes and coaching,) you’ll learn a lot about theContinue reading “Three Aspects of Trans Resilience”
I’ve talked a lot about self-love and self-compassion. So what is “self-care?” It’s a pretty common term. Self-care, in my opinion, is a day-to-day willingness to act on self-love. This is most important in times of stress. Perhaps you just got misgendered, or had a difficult interaction with a family member who isn’t supportive ofContinue reading “What Might Self-Care Look Like?”
Photo above: Mack Johnson, Sydney Baloue, Christian A’Xavier Lovehall, and Sunny Marks at the Philly Trans March in Philadelphia, PA on October 7, 2017. Photo by Sydney Baloue. (From 48Hills) This blog, this site, and my work is on purpose not about fighting for justice, equity and inclusion for trans and gender-expansive people. This doesn’tContinue reading “Black Trans Lives Matter”
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